How Stoicism Can Help You

By Jonathan Crow

Life is filled with adversity. In the modern era, it is easy to let yourself become disillusioned with your surroundings and isolated from your peers. Between social media platforms that offer instant gratification at the expense of interpersonal connections, and ongoing disruptions to public life caused by COVID lockdowns, maintaining a healthy social life has never been more difficult. Many of us have experienced severe strain in upholding our jobs, businesses, and lifestyles as a result.

These are the challenges of our time. Now we must endure and overcome them. Fortunately, there is a whole philosophy dedicated to enduring adversity: Stoicism.

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

These hard times are nothing new. Our ancestors faced their own hardships: war, famine, and disease. Yet they endured, despite the challenges of their times, and fortunately for us they imparted wisdom on coping with life's misfortunes. One such wisdom was the philosophy of Stoicism, founded around 301BC by Zeno of Citium (modern-day Cyprus): a Greek school of thought that aims to direct our thoughts and actions in response to a chaotic universe. In the words of Seneca: 

“...Life is very short and anxious for those who forget the past, neglect the present, and fear the future.” — Seneca, On the Shortness of Life.

Stoicism was originally named Zenonism, after its founder. It was later renamed after the location where Zeno and his followers gathered to discuss their ideas: the Stoa Poikilè. Meaning ‘painted porch’ this was a colonnade decorated with mythic and historical battle scenes, that stood on the north side of the Agora in Athens. Stoicism is sometimes referred to as ‘the Stoa’, or in other words, the philosophy of the porch. 

So what are some of the central tenets of Stoicism, and how can Stoicism help you?

Control

In modern English, the dictionary definition of the word ‘stoic’ is used to refer to an individual who is suppressing their emotions, especially in response to some terrible experience. This is something of a misnomer, however, since Stoicism itself was not about the repression of emotions or numbness towards feelings. Rather, the Stoics understood it is inevitable that during our lives we will experience circumstances outside of our control. 

“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle. Some things are within your control. And some things are not.” — Epictetus.

Stoics believed we should only focus on things within our control: namely, our actions and our mind. Emotions should be experienced in their entirety and subjected to logic and reason, with the aim being to domesticate emotions and not eradicate them. 

For example, you may feel angry about circumstances you find yourself in, but how you resolve to respond to that feeling is within your control. Understanding this principle is key to Stoicism’s strength. In the words of Nassim Nicholas Taleb, author of ‘The Black Swan’ and ‘Anti-Fragile’:

“A Stoic is someone who transforms fear into prudence, pain into transformation, mistakes into initiation, and desire into undertaking.” — Nassim Nicholas Taleb.

You cannot control or change every aspect of the world around you, so it is better to learn what is within your control and make changes within yourself, than obsess over the expectations you place on what you do not control and become frozen in place.

Crisis

Just as the Stoics believed you should focus on things within your control, they also thought that your failure to do so was a choice. Anger, despair, or fear in the face of adversity is not inexorable. Simply put, you do not need to remain pessimistic in response to a crisis – you are pessimistic because you choose to be. 

Once you understand this principle, you can choose to use your energy more productively. My favourite example of this comes from Dr Viktor Frankl, an Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist who survived Auschwitz. Dr Frankl’s book ‘Man’s Search For Meaning’ speaks of his experiences in Auschwitz and how they shaped his philosophies and later his psychiatry. He writes:

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. And there were always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very self, your inner freedom; which determined whether or not you become the plaything to circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity to become moulded into the form of the typical inmate.” — Dr Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search For Meaning.

Dr Frankl witnessed fellow inmates either collapse under the significant burden of their circumstances or — like Viktor himself did — find a way to shoulder the pain and endure. He realised that, as Nietzsche had said, “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” 

Dr Frankl later developed this concept into the Third School of Viennese Psychotherapy, known as Logotherapy. Its name derives from the Greek ‘Logos’ or divine reason. Logotherapy is based on the idea that we as humans are strongly motivated to live purposefully and meaningfully, and find meaning in life as a result of responding authentically and humanely to life’s challenges. A very Stoic idea.

In fact, much of what Stoicism teaches is about learning to embrace a crisis. Not to confuse this with actively pursuing suffering, to embrace a crisis is to modify how you perceive it and treat it as an opportunity to master oneself. 

“Man conquers the world by conquering himself.” – Zeno of Citium.

Negativity

Like Logotherapy, Stoicism is a way of life that requires constant practice and self-discipline. However, it is easy to forget Stoic principles when you are not self-reflecting, but instead interacting with others ‘in the heat of the moment’. Most, if not all, social media platforms take advantage of this and frequently encourage the pursuit of instant gratification, with interactions often being an exercise in scoring likes or shares.

Stoicism teaches us that people around us are outside our control. These people may be dominated by negative emotions or carnal desires, and attempt to manipulate things beyond their control. They may even encourage these negative behaviours in you. Though you do not control the actions of these people, you can control how you respond to them, and how you interact with them. 

For example, you can choose not to react in anger to their misdeeds, and you can choose to be more virtuous in your actions. As such, Stoics believed you should constantly employ your philosophy in a practice known as Askēsis. 

Askēsis can loosely be described as the practice of training self-discipline, and derives from the Greek ‘Askein’ meaning "to exercise" or "to work". Askēsis is, in essence, an exercise aimed at spiritually mastering oneself. One spiritual routine suggested by Marcus Aurelius goes as follows.

“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognised that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own - not of the same blood and birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations.

People are outside of your control and can negatively influence you, controlling your response to the people in your life has as much importance as controlling your reaction to the circumstances you find yourself in. If you cannot tame your emotions in response to (for example) an insult, you leave yourself open to that negative influence, and ultimately vulnerable to disrupted peace of mind.

Mastering Yourself

Stoicism isn’t about ignoring the world around you, but learning to master yourself, develop your character, and improve your interaction - the world. How exactly does one ‘master oneself’? To the Stoics, the answer was virtue.

“If, at some point in your life, you should come across anything better than justice, honesty, self-control, courage – than a mind satisfied that is has succeeded in enabling you to act rationally, and satisfied to accept what’s beyond its control —  if you find anything better than that, embrace it without reservations —  it must be an extraordinary thing indeed —  and enjoy it to the full.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations.

To master yourself as a Stoic was to act virtuously, even in the face of sorrow or fear. But what is virtuous to a Stoic? The Stoic Philosophy has a comprehensive taxonomy of Virtue which is divided into four cardinal virtues that were held above all, and essential to mastering yourself. These virtues are courage, temperance, justice, and wisdom. All of which remain vital in today’s world. 

Stoics believed that acting virtuously would inherently lead to happiness, success, and harmony.

“The man who has virtue is in need of nothing whatever for the purpose of living well.” — Marcus Tullius Cicero.

Courage

A straightforward definition of Stoic Courage is that it is the courage to stick to one’s principles, and embrace the day’s challenges despite whatever hardships may be faced. This includes enduring distress, suffering, and even mortality. It is to readily defy adversity and remain impassive to fear and doubt. As such, misfortune and hardships are perceived as an opportunity to practice this virtue. In short, it is the confidence to test your mettle rather than run in fear.

In Seneca’s Essays and Letters he says the following about those who have never experienced hardship:

“I judge you unfortunate because you have never lived through misfortune. You have passed through life without an opponent — no one can ever know what you are capable of, not even you.” — Seneca, The Stoic Philosophy of Seneca: Essays and Letters.

Temperance

If courage is to face the day, whatever may come, then temperance is the moderation of your response to any problem you may face. Temperance encompasses the idea of self-discipline, and the introspective and calculated response to provocations of fear, anger, or even violence.

It’s all well and good to be brave, but if your bravado leads you to act with recklessness and folly, it becomes a vice. You may face bad news, but an overreaction to that news will most likely make your life harder. So, as the old adage goes, don’t shoot the messenger. 

Justice

The most important of all virtues is justice. Not to be confused with our modern notion of legal justice, Stoic justice is synonymous with morality, and entails a broader concept of compassion and benevolence towards your fellow man. You will see this virtue exemplified in stories of heroism from people knowingly endangering themselves to help others, because “it is the right thing to do”.

Marcus Aurelius said that justice was “the source of all the other virtues”, as without justice to guide your actions, what good is courage if it is only for self-gain. What use is wisdom if not used for the betterment of the world? 

Wisdom

Wisdom, otherwise known as prudence, can be achieved through studying, debate and analysis of yourself and the world around you. One may also draw upon their experiences as guidance in times of need. As Leonardo Da Vinci said, “Wisdom is the daughter of experience”.

Self-reflection is an integral part of Stoicism, and as such, wisdom is the virtue that ties all four virtues together. Do you have the wisdom to know when to be courageous, do you have the temperance to know how far is too far, and do you know what the just action is? 

Moving On

A final lesson that is crucial to learn in Stoicism is understanding that tomorrow is a new day. When faced with adversity, it is easy to become overwhelmed when we cannot see an end in sight. The pain and suffering we feel can seem endless and daunting. But we must never forget that “this too shall pass”: fear of what may come will do nothing for you but cloud your judgement. 

In The 13th Warrior, after the protagonist Ahmed’s first battle alongside his Viking companions, they must retire for the night to ensure they are fresh for the next battle. Ahmed turns to Herger the Joyous and asks him “How can you sleep at a time like this?”. Herger responds to him, unfazed by the recent fight, 

“The All-Father wove the skein of your life a long time ago. Go and hide in a hole if you wish, but you won't live one instant longer. Your fate is fixed. Fear profits a man nothing.” — Herger the Joyous, The 13th Warrior.

While few of us consider ourselves warriors, there may be challenges closer to home that we better relate to. Anyone who has ever dieted will know that trying to make a positive change in your eating can feel like a monumental task until you break it down, day by day. So, yesterday you faltered, and you ate an entire pizza… Will you let that define your week, or your whole year? It is simply better to move on. The failures of yesterday are the past, and beyond your control. But you can control how to act today, and learn to move on. 

“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it is called the present.” — Master Oogway, Kung Foo Panda.

Conclusion

In our society we frequently face opportunities to become discouraged, with the negative impact of social media platforms becoming more apparent in recent years, at times distracting us from creating deeper friendships with our fellow man. Thankfully, life does not need to be this way. The ancestral wisdom passed down to us is time tested.

Now that we are facing hardship, it is imperative that we take onboard the experience of our forebears, learn from their example, and apply their teachings. It will take much courage to face these coming challenges, and I truly believe that Stoic teachings can play a vital role in helping us to overcome both our personal obstacles and generate greater social cohesion.

I believe, like the Stoics before me, that practising stoicism will lead to greater happiness, success, and harmony.

Further Reading

• Marcus Aurelius, ‘Meditations’, (CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, 2016)

• Williamson, Diane: ‘Kant’s Theory of Emotion: Emotional Universalism’, (Palgrave Macmillan, 2015)

• Robertson, Donald: ‘Stoicism and the Art of Happiness’, (Teach Yourself, 2018)

• Seneca, ‘On the Shortness of Life’, (Penguin; UK Edition, 2004)

• Seneca, ‘The Stoic Philosophy of Seneca: Essays and Letters’, (W. W. Norton & Company, 1990)

• Dr Viktor Frankl, ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’, (Rider, 2004)

Editor’s Note

Thanks for reading. If you enjoyed this article, feel free to leave your comments and feedback in the comments below. You can follow Jonathan on Twitter here.

Next week, I’ll be taking a look at Zen Buddhism, which I believe to hold important pieces of the puzzle of life that might be missing from Stoicism.